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Commandment 5: Do things on your own

DO THINGS ON YOUR OWN. 

“Be alone. Eat alone, take yourself on dates, sleep alone. In the midst of this you will learn about yourself. You will grow, you will figure out what inspires you, you will curate your own dreams, your own beliefs, your own stunning clarity” 

Spending time with yourself is massively important to be confident, to learn how to love yourself and to understand who you are and what you want. (and not what society, family or whoever wants you to be) 

Like Oscar Wild said : 

“I think it is very healthy to spend time alone. You need to be alone and not be defined by another person”.

The top benefices of doing things alone: 

  • Learn about yourself 
  • Clear your mind 
  • Figure out what you really want and who you are
  • Gain self-confidence
  • Becoming more independent
  • Breath
  • Be yourself truly 
  • Recharge yourself

Alone time is massively important for me on a daily basis.
I need my 30 minutes all alone, just to focus on myself, recharge myself. 

Before covid, I used to go to the museum, go for walks, go to the cinema, eat or travel alone.
I really enjoyed those “me time”. And I can only recommend you to try if you did not already.

The thing that help me massively in my life was to travel alone (before covid).

TRAVELLING ALONE:

When you travel alone you have to get out of your comfort zone. You push your limits above and beyond. And ultimately you learn a lot about yourself. 
This is what I love about it.

It can be scary to travel alone. But what was even scarier for me was to miss on things I really wanted to do just because no one was able to join me in my adventures.

So, if you are waiting for friends to join you, STOP. DON’T WAIT. Trust me you will make friends along the way and ultimately not be alone anymore.

During my solo travels, I have never been alone. I always met people (I am still friends with them!)

I was really worried that I would be homesick, not being able to make friends because I was quite shy. But all of those fears disappeared quickly.

BENEFITS OF TRAVELING ALONE:

FREEDOM: When you travel alone you discover a new kind of freedom. You can do whatever you want, whenever you want. No need for you to compromise or wait. You have your time in your own hands. 

PERSONAL GROWTH: You learn how to become more independent, confident. You learn about who you truly are. What you like and what you don’t like. Trust your instincts (they are stronger than you think) 

Don’t wait for people to do what you want. You can end up waiting a bloody lifetime and in a couple of years you’ll be left only with regrets. 

When you travel solo, you have to become a problem solver. This empower you when you realize that you can actually survive on your own (i.e. before I was mostly traveling with my family or friends, and when something went wrong I had the safety net of not having to deal with the problem alone) 

“One can choose to go back toward safety or forward toward growth. Growth must be chosen again and again; fear must be overcome again and again” ABRAHAM MASLOW 

I totally understand that solo travelling is not for everyone. I had a friend who came back only after a weekend because being on her own was a little bit to overwhelming for her. At least, she tried!

I am not saying that traveling with family or friends is bad! Some of my best travel adventures are with my loved ones. I LOVE traveling with them.
What am I saying is, solo traveling is a completely different experience, and sometimes to know yourself you need to be on your own to see what you can actually achieve on your own.

ENJOY YOUR OWN COMPANY:

You need to learn to enjoy your own company. To enjoy spending time with yourself. After all, you are stuck with you 24h, 7/7. Better to enjoy it right? Haha

Don’t wait on people to do things.
You want to go to the cinema but no one can join you? GO
You want to learn how to dance with a friend but you are on your own? GOOOOOO
You want to travel to spain but no one can join you? GOOOOOOOOOOO

Life is way to short to wait on people in order to do what you want to do.

That said, I also need to “warn” you about a detail, especially if you are going to the restaurant or cinema by yourself.
People might look at you, because in our society, it is somehow considered “weird” to do those activities on your own. WTH right?
But… who cares ????? YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT PERSON. People will judge if they want to judge. Don’t let them impact your vibes. ENJOY YOUR LIFE. IT IS YOURS AND NOBODY’S ELSE’S. 

And always remember, “Be confident, Be you” 

love


Lots of Love, 
Sophia  

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